Being a REALTOR® is a bit surreal at times. The tight rope the law requires us to walk is next-to impossible. We’re supposed to advise our clients but not make them feel pressured to make a decision. We’re supposed to write contracts for our clients but not give legal advice (ha!). We’re supposed to recommend vendors (attorneys, inspectors, etc.) without giving the impression that we’re selecting vendors for them. We’re supposed to fully represent Client A who puts an offer in on a house while somehow also fully representing Client B who puts an offer in on the same house.
Sometimes the net result of all these conflicting legal requirements is that we have to speak somewhat indirectly so as to ensure that our clients make their own decisions rather than us making the decisions for them. So with that in mind, here are some things you may have heard your REALTOR® say, and what he (probably and humorously) really means.
Realtor Says: I suspect this home was used as a rental.
Realtor Means: Whoever lived in this home, they really didn’t take good care of it. Do you know how to repair sheetrock?
Realtor Says: This is a cute, starter-home.
Realtor Means: As long as you’re not planning to have any (more) children any time soon, this home will be just perfect!
Realtor Says: Give it a few years, and I bet this area will be “hopping.”
Realtor Means: Let’s face it; there’s not a lot of demand for this neighborhood at the moment.
Realtor Says: Oh really? That’s what Zillow said your home was worth? Sure, we could definitely price it in that range and see what happens.
Realtor Means: Your home isn’t worth what you’re asking. Would you please let me show you a CMA so that we can price your home for what the market says it’s worth?
Realtor Says: This is a “transitional” neighborhood.
Realtor Means: The neighborhood is on the upswing, but for the next few years, there’s a good chance you’ll see some drug use and dealing. Hopefully you won’t have to smell pot too often.
Realtor Says: Out here you’ll enjoy getting away from the hustle and bustle of the city.
Realtor Means: This home is really in the middle of nowhere! Do you even know how far away the nearest grocery store is?
Realtor Says: All it needs is a little soap and paint, and you’re also set!
Realtor Means: Be sure that you sanitize your shoes before you step back into your house. And maybe take a shower before eating dinner.
Realtor Says: This is a great street. Just be careful walking around some of the other blocks.
Realtor Means: Make sure you lock your doors, and don’t be out too late at night.
Realtor Says: This home just has tons of potential!
Realtor Means: Be prepared to invest quite a bit into the home to bring it to move-in condition. Do you need the phone numbers for any contractors?
Realtor Says: There are a lot of great colors in here!
Realtor Means: My eyes hurt. Don’t the home renovation channels recommend neutral colors?